My wife does not trust me and wants to leave me for something I said...?

Your wife is taking a perfect relationship and allowing her insecurities to take over which could result in you slowly pulling away and resenting her. If I were you I'd nip this in the bud and go to counselling so you have a mediator in the room. Jealousy is a horrible thing and can ruin everything. There is something going on with her. Maybe she's afraid of getting older. It's sad because women in their 40's are super hot and she's still only in her 30's. Try to reassure her and tell her how gorgeous she is and how in love with her you are. Seems like she's having trouble with the the idea that another woman can turn you on but it's totally natural, it doesn't mean you want to sleep with everybody. I'm sure there are good looking men that she wouldn't mind cuddling. Ask her who she thinks is hot in Hollywood just to illustrate this point. I'm sure everything will be fine. Keep reassuring her and if she can't get over it, go to counselling to show that you are trying to work it out. Do not give up your dreams because of this. If it's not about your co-star it will be about your co-worker at a regular job. This is her problem and she has to take care of it. Good luck!